Not every guy will admit it, but most can agree that receiving a blow job is one of life’s greatest pleasures. A partner is capable of producing so much more sensation than your hand. It feels good, it’s fun, and it leads to other fun activities with your partner.
The problem is, just like anything, blowjobs don’t last forever. Well, for some they might, but that’s an entirely different problem. You need a way to receive that blowjob level of sensation whenever you feel like it.
Ever heard of an blowjob machine? If not, that’s okay. You’re not the only one missing out. But if 24/7 blowjob availability is what you’ve always dreamed of, keep reading. They might just be your solution.
If you’re asking yourself “what the hell is a blowjob machine?” then welcome to a whole new world. Let’s break down what a blowjob machine is and what it feels like. In this buyer’s guide, we’ll give you tips toward buying the best blowjob machine and a few products to check out for yourself.
Quick Reference Guide – Top 3 Blowjob Machines:
Kiiroo/Fleshlight Onyx 2 | AutoBlow2 | The Fleshlight/Kiiroo Launch |
---|---|---|
Pros:
Wireless |
Pros: Intense Stimulation |
Pros: Wireless |
Cons: Expensive |
Cons: Bulky |
Cons: Cumbersome |
View Price | View Price | View Price |
Please continue reading for full breakdown and review of the best blowjob machines.
What Is a Blowjob Machine?
It’s pretty much just like it sounds. A blowjob machine is a convenient tool designed to simulate the blowjob experience. Feeling-wise, it’s as realistic as it’s ever going to get outside the real thing.
The blowjob machine is built to support a penis with a cushiony interior. Once it’s inside, the machine’s motor moves rings or beads from shaft to tip at controllable speeds. It creates the feeling of a mouth moving up and down your penis, just like the real thing!
Blowjob machines are small in size. They can be easily stored away for safety, privacy, and convenience. Some are battery operated. However, it’s likely that you’ll find models that plug into a wall outlet. These are designed for you to use a few feet away in a comfortable chair, couch, or bed.
What Makes a Good Blowjob Machine?
It’s amazing that there are a ton of attractive blowjob machines on the market. They all promise realistic quality at competitive prices – with some unique features, too! However, if you’re not careful, you might end up with a cheap model that breaks easily or doesn’t come as promised. Worse, it might not deliver that realistic feeling you thought you’d receive.
Here’s a guideline of several things you want to keep in mind if you’re getting too excited and tempted to order the first product you see on the web.
Price
Even though top-rated products have amazing customer reviews, they might not be the best fit for you. You may be a newbie and just want an introduction, and the best product is over your head. Or you might be a more simplistic guy who just wants to get the sensation and put the thing away.
Blowjob machine prices range drastically. Some come with few add-ons and features that focus on sensation. Others deliver cutting-edge technology with Bluetooth hookups to favorite websites. The gadgets included are not indicative of how a model will feel. It’s better to find something that’s in your price range than get distracted by features you might never use.
Textures
Each machine will vary in what it feels like. Are you looking for a lot of cushion, or will your penis need a bit more breathing room? Investigate this so you don’t pick one that’s too snug later.
Sensations
Each model should come with several choices for feeling. Usually this ranges from light to intense sensation. The machine controls how fast and pressurized you want you want your blowjob to be.
If you’re a guy who likes to change it up, choose one that has at least three different speed settings.
Usability
The machine is only as good as how easy it is to use. There are several components that define a machine’s usability:
- How easy is the machine to hold? Is it easy to grip or is it likely you’ll drop it when using or transporting it? A bulky device can ruin the experience
- Will you need any attachments or other parts to use it? If you don’t have all the parts, you might end up making additional purchases, which is extremely aggravating when you’re just trying to get off.
- Most importantly, how does it charge? Is it wireless, or does it need to charge in a socket? If it takes batteries, how long does it last before shutting off? If you like your sessions long, nothing will be worse than blue balls when your machine needs to charge. Factor this into your final purchase.
Upkeep
Your machine is going to get messy. There’s no way around this. However, you can make your life easier by purchasing a machine that’s designed with cleanup in mind.
You should be able to apply a lubricant and antibacterial cleaner to the material. Watch out for machines that are water-sensitive. Because it’s exposed to so many liquids, this will make it harder to take care of.
Appearance
The look of the machine isn’t important to everyone. However, it’s possible that it might be a deal breaker. You could find a model that’s perfect for your size and price range, but you just can’t stand the color.
Appearance is more important than we think. It’s the reason we drive around cool cars and wear nice clothes on a date. It looks good and makes us feel good. So, putting an ugly contraption onto your dick might not make you feel sexiest.
Some machines expose the device’s inner-workings. Others are mysterious on the outside and only understood by touch. The good news is there are tons of both kinds on the market. It’s easy to find one that’s colorful and unique just as much as traditional and simple in design.
Compatibility
If it is important to you that your new machine syncs with your other devices, you need to do an extra step of research. It’s not enough to pick out the most fitting blowjob machine. It’s got to pair with your wireless devices.
Discretion
You might be buying your machine in secret. The last thing you want is for your machine to expose you.
- If it’s bulky, it’s a storage problem. It’s going to be a lot harder to hide in a secret spot.
- If it’s colorful, it’s more likely that it won’t camouflage into its environment.
- If it’s noisy, other people will know what you’re up to, and this completely kills the vibe! Keep your eye out for any product that promises “undetectable” sound or quiet movement. Go with a 1-year warranty-backed machine in case this turns out to be false advertising.
What Are the Best Blowjob Machines?
Keeping all of the above criteria in mind, we tested several blowjob machines on the market and researched the feel of a bunch of different popular choices. We’ve come up with the top best blowjob machines you can purchase in 2019. Trust that as the best blowjob machines, all of these are going to feel amazing. Consider the unique traits that each offers. There might even be some qualities that make a specific choice a deal-breaker for you.
1) Kiiroo/Fleshlight Onyx 2
Pros:
- Wireless
- Undetectable Sound
- Quality and Safe Materials
- Slick Design
Cons:
- Expensive
- 2-3 Hour Charge Required
- Equipment Updates Needed
The Onyx 2 is the future of blowjob machines. It not only comes with a realistic and slick device, but also VR capabilities. Using Bluetooth smart device compatibility, you can stream porn from your phone or TV right to your personal headset. If you’ve been looking to upgrade your masturbating experience, this is the full package. Read our full Kiroo Onyx 2 review.
The machine itself comes in a jet black exterior. It’s not the most beautiful design we’ve ever seen, but it’s far from ugly. Rather, it channels tradition, smoothness, and simplicity. It’s taking emphasis away from how it looks toward how it feels.
It’s made entirely of medical-grade silicone and high-density polymer. This powers a breathtaking 140 strokes per minute. A mouth could never match that power.
Even though the Onyx 2 has a simple look, you might find a more appealing gadget look-wise. A downside of this device is that it’s pricier than other options. It doesn’t have the longest battery life on the market as it is good for 2-3 hours. You’ll need to keep it updated and deal with general Bluetooth syncing issues if you stream porn from the headset. However with the VR hook-up and Bluetooth capabilities, as well as the realistic stimulation, it’s worth the investment!
2) AutoBlow2
Pros:
- Intense Stimulation
- Removable Inner Sleeves
- Singular Design
- Easy to Clean
Cons:
- Bulky
- Distracting Appearance
- Not Suitable For Large Lengths
The AutoBlow2 is considered by many to be the best blowjob sex toy a dude can use. This machine gives a performance you pretty much just can’t beat. The motor makes this machine a powerhouse. It promises at least 1,000 hours of use. This means no cords or batteries required. It runs all by itself whenever you power on. Read our full AutoBlow 2 review.
It can be used hands-free. Inside, there are three removable sleeves that increase or decrease tightness. For thicker penises, this device is the way to go. Its walls can be removed, and its girth density is 50% greater than other models.
The design is colorful and exciting. You can watch the machine work its magic when in action. It’s beads are completely visible. However, this device’s appearance might not suit every guy. It might be too distracting, making the Onyx 2’s traditional look more preferable.
Another potential downside of this device is its height limit. Unfortunately, the AutoBlow 2 has a cutoff of 9″. Most guys average at 5″, so this shouldn’t be a problem. However, anyone with a larger penis than 9″ will have to get off elsewhere.
3) The Fleshlight/Kiiroo Launch
Pros:
- Wireless
- Lightweight
- Most Intense Motor
- Undetectable Sound
- 1-Year Warranty
Cons:
- Cumbersome
- Most Expensive
- Requires Separate Attachment
The Fleshlight is a toy that’s enjoyed fame for years. This device surpasses its predecessor in every way and makes it look ancient. It replaced hand movement completely with the most powerful blowjob machine ever. Read our full Fleshlight Launch review.
It also uses VR technology to bring you an unforgettable session each night. It’s conveniently compatible with Google Glass, Oculus Rift, and others. It comes with a subscription of porn content, so you have a large selection to choose from. In comparison to the charging capacity of the Onyx 2 at approximately 6-9 hours, the Fleshlight lasts much longer. However, you can expect the battery life to weaken with use.
The motor pumps at a powerful 180 automated strokes per minute. It’s hard to imagine how amazing this must feel, until you’re using it yourself. Then, you just can’t believe it.
You can use your current Fleshlight, or another device like the Onyx Two to insert. if you don’t have one already, you’ll have to make an additional purchase. Otherwise, this machine doesn’t have all of its parts.
Unlike other models you’ll come across with easy to grip packaging, the Fleshlight Launch is cumbersome. It’s boxy and would be a pain to hide or keep discreet. However, it is lightweight. Just be careful not to drop it, as it is extremely delicate.
Also unlike other machines the Kiiroo-Launch is sensitive to water. This includes lube body fluids. With the most power, comes the need for the most responsibility. Care for this machine, and it will change the way you play. A bonus is its 1-year warranty.
4) Lovense Max
Pros:
- Affordable
- Touch Sensitive
- Promotes Couple Play
- No Add-ons required
Cons:
- Less Powerful Motor
- No VR Capabilities
- Not Wireless
The Lovense Max isn’t the most powerful. It’s not the fastest or most impressive. But it’s definitely the coolest.
This touch-sensitive device syncs with a mobile app that allows you to control its performance from your phone. Air vents alter the suction control, which changes the sensations you feel. It’s kind of like a massage chair with a control pad…but for your dick!
What also makes the Lovense Max so cool is that it’s perfect to use with your partner. Besides using it by yourself, ask your partner to fool around with the mobile app controls. It could become a hot game to let them take over.
It also comes with a rechargeable battery that’s ideal for using on the go. You and your partner can travel with it together and even use it long distance. Because it’s not as powerful as the others, it’s also more affordable. When you buy the Lovense Max, everything is included. No extra purchases required.
5) Sayber X
Pros:
- Affordable
- Attractive Design
- Sensory Add-ons
- Compact
- Durable
Cons:
- For Small and Average Sizes Only
- Average Motor
- Lack of Features
If you’re looking for a blowjob toy that’s easy to grab onto and travel with, the Sayber X is for you. It lacks a lot of the fancy additional features for hardcore porn fans. What makes this choice great is that it just gets the job done.
This model has the most attractive design out of the bunch. It’s detailed and structured with side gripping, so you don’t have to worry about dropping this device during exciting play.
Built with “SayberSkin”, the feel of the Sayber is highly realistic. Like the Onyx and AutoBlow, pleasure rings pump up and down to create a pressure-filled sensation. However, the Sayber takes this further and offers motion sensor rings for an additional charge.
How to Choose the Top Blowjob Machine?
You might be thinking: all of these sound great! It’s true, they are. But they all have qualities suited for each individual.
If you’re still stuck on which to get, here are three questions to ask yourself:
- What’s the size of my penis? Really? It’s an important question because guys tend to lie to themselves. If they’re in denial about their size, they’ll buy a device that doesn’t fit them at all.
- Do I need the visuals? Certain sex machines come with amazing programming, but there’s no pressure to go with this choice if you’re not that into porn. You might just be here for the blowjob and want to call it a day, and that’s fine. What matters most is the feeling the machine gets you, not what you can watch with it.
- What are the cons? Don’t discount the downfalls of a product even after you’re set on it. This helps you choose what’s most practical. You might regret taking home the machine with powerful speed but distracting noise. Keep your head on and choose wisely!
The best advice about buying a sex machine? Be honest with yourself. Ask yourself what you really want out of the experience, not what you’re supposed to buy. It’s like a car. If you’re putting a huge investment into a new ride, are you going to buy the car of your dreams or something your friends want you to get? A blowjob machine is no different.
Now that you’re more familiar with the products, the pressure’s on you. Get familiar with the products by checking out their websites. Read some reviews and learn about what real people had to say about it. View prices to get a sense of what features you can afford and which aren’t necessary.
Bottom line? Don’t let buying the best blowjob of your life be a throwaway decision. Own it, and enjoy it!
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